Capture Your Grief: Day 19

Support...

Losing Billy and Rosie was an eye opening situation for us especially when it came to a support network.  Friends that I thought I could count on and would always be there were not there for me in my deepest hour of need and sadness.  Friends that I enjoyed, but did not consider them really close were surprisingly the ones that were there for me the most.  They were the ones who checked up on me and called persistently until I was able to talk.  Alex and Kara made sure that I knew that they loved me and would always be there.  Some people like Jamie and Brenda, I always knew would be there and they were.  Sadly, Kari was not there like I expected her to be.  Maybe she just didn't know what to say or what to do.  Maybe she felt helpless and hurt causing her to be unable to be there for me.  I will never know and I will always have that pain in my heart that she couldn't or wouldn't be there for me, but I will give her the benefit of the doubt because she has been my best friend for almost 20 years.

Assistance with Grief was an invaluable source of support, care and love.  They were so helpful and understood my pain because they lived through it themselves.  The friends I made through the group are treasured and I know that they really know how I feel.  They aren't pretending or trying to understand, they have been there and they understand the depth of grief and the joy of having Molly.

Walk to Remember and Rowan Tree have also been great resources.  They are always there for memorials so that we can remember our sweet little angels.  They are there and know about our angels so that our angels will never be forgotten. 

Finally, my greatest support has been my husband. He has lived through the hell of losing Billy and Rosie, gone through the bone chilling fear of possibly losing Molly and the great and amazing joy of bringing Molly into this world and hearing her cry.  I don't know what I would have done without him.  My sister has also been wonderful.  She always makes sure to remember Billy and Rosie and never forgets that they were here and they meant everything to us.  She also carefully balances the joy we experience with Molly with the constant memory of Billy and Rosie.